Tuesday, July 15, 2008

I Hate Change

Having been through a number of computers over the last couple of years, I occasionally stumble across old files from long ago. Today brings just such memories to light as I re-discovered my college graduation speech. It's pretty apt considering that just a few hours ago I declared today "I Hate Change Day". I'm posting this speech mostly so that I can continue laughing, but also as a reminder that change can bring about good things.

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I hate change—loose change or life change.

When I moved to Franklin and started living on a college student budget, I some how got the idea to have two collection stations for my loose change—my truck and my little miniature-plastic-combination safe that I’m sure I stole from one of my siblings. Some how more of the change ended up in my truck. I have this suspicion, looking back, that that was the case after I discovered how well loose change worked with the Wendy’s $.99 menu or the Sonic half-price-drink schedule. I still found myself grimacing any time I had to put change in my pocket and wait to deposit it in one of my two “accounts”—Oh, but when you taste a lemon-berry slush from Sonic—it’s Heaven!

Dave just moved back to Franklin this year to finish up school. In January he succeeded in kind of speeding up the process of the whole wedding thing. Some day, hopefully, in the near future maybe he and Danielle will be blessed with a family. But for now, he’s wrestling with being a practical Trinitarian visionary—along with our friends, the Graysons—and is planning to put his incredible wisdom and Moral Philosophy skills into rigorous action by joining with Robbie to reshape Stone Table Tutorial.

Kristin “joined the club” this year and was a bit apprehensive about how she would be received. Which is not surprising because it seems anything relating to Der sometimes has a reputation for being a groupie sort-a thing. But with her help, I think we’ve dispelled all notions of cliquishness. Kristin was dissatisfied with her college education. I’m sure that more than once it put her on the brink of tears because she knew there was something more—something richer. When she came to Bannockburn, we all knew she had found it. And we all became the richer for it. In the course of this year, Kristin too has found herself in a tizzy of wedding preparations. She and Alan, though, must wait until July, which gives them a few more months to eagerly anticipate the changes that the coming weeks and months will bring. Seminary in Jackson, MS is Alan’s call and thus is Kristin’s call at this time in life. They too, Lord willing, will in the future be blessed with a family of their own.

It was a hectic day for all three of us some weeks ago when I felt like starting a deep conversation—some thirty seconds before class was to start, I’m sure. “I hate change.” And in that thirty seconds as I read the faces of Dave and Kristin, the expressions said and unsaid seemed to reveal the same thought.

It seems that each year the following year is looked forward to only with anticipated dread. We’ve looked at this year of changes that the three of us have experienced together, and though we’ve grimaced quite a few times, we wouldn’t exchange it for the world. We’ve all had the thought that there’s no way next year can get any better than this. But in that 30-second-right-before-class-deep-discussion time, we realized that we had at one point or another said that last year and the year before and most likely each year previous—“There’s no way next year could be any better than this.”
But it can be, and most likely will. Though the unforeseen is a bit more frightening at some times than others, and though the mere idea of change will continue to make us grimace, we will continue to be reminded that our callings are sure because we’re investing in something so much bigger than ourselves. We may have to wait to deposit our loose change—Oh, but when you taste of the glories of God’s covenant plan—it’s Heaven!

1 comment:

Inkling said...

It's me...Dave's sis, Sara. Just saying hi from something like 2,500 miles away.

Thanks for taking me back down memory lane. It was a fun trip, and served as a peaceful break in my rather stressful day. You see, my life today is all about change, as Dave could also say. And we still don't really like it. If I'm honest, I will admit to hating it vehemently. But whether I hate it or like it, apparently God has ordained that my life be one of great change and upheaval this year.

What I'd like to say is this....

1. I'm proud of you, and Dave/Danielle, and Alan/Kristen. You guys have all faced change and upheaval head on. You have courageously kept on course in the midst of uncertain and unstable times, continuing to trust the One who loves you most, knowing that the end is safely within His sovereign plan.

2. I need that example right this minute in my own life. As my husband and I face unemployment, a new but very hard job, a baby on the way with far different healthcare than I'm used to, having to move, wondering if God will grow our ministry and give us a home base, being far from family going through tough times, and a million other little but painful changes, I need that reminder that there is a covenant plan and a Covenant Maker and Keeper who has me in His hand every single moment of every single painful change.

Thanks, Amy. You are a gift.